Signs of Depression in Men

Depression affects women and men

Being tough is a quality many men are encouraged to work toward starting in childhood. Popular culture (and even family and friends) imply it’s not manly to talk about your feelings or show emotion, summed up by the expression “Man up.”

But this traditional idea of masculinity — stoic, brave, self-reliant — can be detrimental to your mental health. If you don’t talk about your feelings or recognize something feels wrong, you could end up with a serious mental illness like depression.

While more women report being depressed than men, part of that discrepancy is likely because many men grow up thinking depression is a sign of weakness. So they’re less inclined to recognize symptoms, talk about them and seek help. And studies show the consequences of untreated depression in men are severe — affecting relationships and work performance and even leading to suicide.

The good news: Even severe male depression can be successfully treated.

“Depression typically is not a condition that gets better by itself over time, or something you can ‘snap out of’,” says Kylie Oleski, PsyD, a clinical psychologist and director of adult integrated services in the Geisinger Psychiatry Department. “It’s like if you break your arm, you don’t expect to heal without medical help. It’s the same with depression. Effective treatments are available, so you can have a healthier, more fulfilling life.”

Risk factors for male depression

“Depression is usually caused by a combination of factors,” says Dr. Oleski. “If it runs in your family, you are more apt to have it. But life events and chronic stress also can play a role in depression.”

Pressure from work, relationships and financial concerns may take a toll. So do chronic illnesses, like diabetes or heart disease, and significant life changes, such as physical injury, job loss, divorce or death. Any of these factors can cause persistent anxiety and lead to depression.

Signs of depression in men

Men often express emotional distress differently from women — and use different coping strategies — which can make it more difficult to diagnose male depression.

“Men and women both experience depression, but their signs and symptoms might be different,” says Dr. Oleski. “When a woman feels depressed, she might show sadness or hopelessness, whereas a depressed man might exhibit anger, frustration or aggression.”

Signs of depression in men can manifest themselves in different ways, including:

Feeling angry, irritable or aggressive
Feeling sad, emotional or hopelessness
Feeling anxious or restless
Showing escapist behavior, such as spending more time at work, playing video games or watching TV
Having a hard time sleeping, or sleeping a lot
Eating too much, or eating too little/loss of appetite
Showing physical symptoms, such as pain, headache or digestive issues
Losing interest in work, family, friends and activities once enjoyed (including sex)
Taking part in high-risk activities, or turning to drugs or alcohol to cope

You may not have all these symptoms. In fact, it’s more common to have just a few. But the first step is recognizing that you have depression symptoms. Then talk to a friend, a loved one or your doctor about them.

When to seek help for male depression from your doctor

If male depression symptoms persist for more than 2 weeks and are significantly disrupting daily life — at work, at home or both — it’s probably time to reach out for support.

“You can start by talking to your spouse or partner or a close friend or relative about how you’re feeling,” says Dr. Oleski. “They can help you get the help you need from your primary care doctor or a mental health professional.”

Your primary care doctor can start by assessing your condition. They’re trained to discuss these issues and can offer guidance, support and potential treatment options tailored to your individual needs. Or they can refer you to a mental health specialist, if necessary.

During an exam, they’ll likely review your medical history and ask about your symptoms to rule out other conditions that produce similar ones to depression.

You’ll need to tell your doctor how long you’ve been having these symptoms, if you have a family history of mental illness and whether you’ve been treated for depression before. Information about your general health, like whether you drink and smoke, or exercise regularly, can be of use, too.

Treatment for male depression

Depending on your symptoms, health history and individual needs, your doctor may recommend treating depression with therapy, medication or a combination of both.

Talk therapy, especially cognitive behavioral therapy, is a foundational treatment for male depression. It offers a safe space to discuss your feelings, thoughts and behaviors with a professional. You’ll learn to identify negative patterns, develop healthier coping strategies and set realistic goals.

If your doctor prescribes medication, such as antidepressants, to treat your depression, take it exactly as it’s prescribed and pay attention to how it makes you feel. Some side effects, such as a headache or nausea, might improve over time, but report them to your doctor. They may adjust your dosage or recommend another route for treatment.

Adopting healthier lifestyle habits, stress management and good sleep hygiene can also help improve male depression.

“If you’re feeling depressed, know that you’re not alone and help is readily available. The right thing to do is to talk to someone about it,” says Dr. Oleski. “Seeking help for depression leads to improved mental health and well-being.”